What disturbed me most about this whole situation was the loss of my ideas, my creativity, and my writing energy. Last summer (a season when I tend to feel my best) I spent a few afternoons working on my novel in progress but really had to force myself to sit down and do it. Ive been meeting my deadlines for my newspaper columns but sometimes just barely. Finally it dawnwd me: I was losing myself!
Well, something had to be done. Fortunately, I read an article describing harmful side effects of the medication I was taking and it was disturbing enough to make me take action. "No more of this stuff, please," I asked of my doctor, who understood my concerns and prescribed something different. And, because most things don't go smoothly for me, there were serious side effect issues with that medication and it took several weeks to wean off it and begin a trial of something new.
And guess what? That one seems to be working (shh, don't jinx it)! My pain is decreasing and my head feels clearer. I still tire easily and sleep poorly but I feel I have my brain back. And its not all mush, as I feared. My online word games and my recent efforts to join a regular cribbage night have kept it in fairly good shape.
The other saving graces have been time with grandchildren and social interactions with friends here on our country mile or at church.
Many thanks to one of my faithful readers who gently but insistently prodded and reminded me about how much I used to enjoy blogging and how much she used to enjoy reading it. She kept me thinking about it, even when I was at my lowest.
Since it's still January, I'll make a start on a New year's resolution (technically, it's never too late for those) and resolve to write more, especially posting here and making progress on the novel. First draft -- here we come!
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