Papa's Girl

(Papa - 1921-2012)

Once again, it's been far too long since I've posted here.  I had a couple of items ready to go but life intervened and they just didn't feel appropriate any more.  One item, for example, was a very cheery one about how cozy and warm a stormy weekend earlier this month was shaping up.

And then, that same weekend I got a phone call and everything changed ... And then two more calls in the night.  I ended up driving out to western Manitoba where my parents live and joining Mom, my brothers, and my sisters at my dear Dad's bedside as he laboured to leave this world.  He passed away to a better world at 2:27 a.m. on Wednesday, November 14 and left us behind to miss him and find our world diminished by his absence.

It was an intense week and by the time funeral was over on Saturday, November 17, we were all ready to return to our normal lives.  But, how do you do that when you're in the midst of recognizing what an impact this person, who is no longer here, had on your world?   My Mom has more than once described me as a "Daddy's girl" and I now found myself thinking how I was going to be Daddy's girl (or Papa's girl, as I usually called him Papa) without him here.  For two weeks now, I've been at a loss ... and feeling lost. 

Yesterday, I told my brother Ron how I was feeling  and he said, "I'm surprised to hear that, Jo (my brothers are the only ones allowed to call me Jo).  Because of your deep faith and what you know about human nature through your work, I thought you'd handle this differently.  I'm glad, though, that I can offer you some comfort for a change."

And I've been thinking about Ron's words ever since.  Just this morning I realized that he told me pretty much what Papa would have told me had I been able to confide in him.  Papa was very wise and a man of faith; he lives on in Ron and my other siblings, hopefully even in me.  And that thought alone is enough to make me feel a little more oriented in my life.

Now, I want to live my life in such a way that I honour my Papa ... and that I deserve to join him in heaven some day.  Thanks, Ron, for nudging me to go on being Papa's girl.